Well, I got up early this morning and had a total panic attack – I had no way of picking up my previous notes on the project and making sense of it. I had a lot of ideas, but I’d lost the vision of the whole in the months since I started. I had a lot of shiny, broken bits and pieces and no idea how they should have gone together.
Note to self: when you have everything clear in your head and it’s all hot and shiny and all you have to do is just manage to not fuck it up…do it. Don’t wait. Don’t set it aside for four months, because when you come back you won’t have any idea how it all fits together.
So I started writing about things, rather than trying to write the story. I wrote about the various areas that the Carnival will hold, such as the Wild Hunt carousel (which occasionally eats small children). I wrote about the Vagabondi, the clown/tumbler troupe based on commedia dell’arte. Two warring bands of clowns, jugglers and tumblers, one from the Summer Court and one from the Winter Court who perform short impromptu plays throughout the Carnival which mock the Court on the opposing side. They also hint at secrets and imply things in pantomime that most are afraid to whisper out loud, as the night winds carries all secrets to the Queen of Darkness. I described the Marionette Theatre and the King of the Cats, whip in hand…and so far I have something like 2,500 words, over my daily goal of 2000.
It will all get replaced, of course, but for now it serves a purpose. I haven’t even had the time to blog recently, and I haven’t written anything in a very long time. But my ass is in the chair, and I’m adding words to the count…and as I fall into a groove, hopefully they’ll be more graceful words that I’ll be happy to keep. Which I guess is the whole lesson of NaNoWriMo: Yes, it will most probably suck, but that’s not the point. Try to not suck, of course, but primarily you just need to force yourself through it and put words on paper. In December you’ll start revising and throw most of them away, but at least you’ll have a start.
Anyway, the video above? That is TOTALLY my marionette theatre. I can picture Perdita in her red shoes dancing there with her painted smile, leaving bloody tracks as she dances.